"When Will Dad be Home? I Need His Wheelchair"
Geoff travels a lot during the winter, and we do miss him. However, our daughter also really misses his wheelchair, which never ceases to make me laugh. After a long day of skiing, she can often be seen moving about our kitchen in her dad’s chair, making transfers to and from the couch or our bed like a seasoned professional. Of course, at this point, her dad has already transferred from his chair to the couch, thereby “freeing up” his wheelchair. Last night, she mentioned casually that this vacation week of skiing nearly every day in fresh powder has made her legs really tired and what a shame Dad was away in Maine with his wheelchair.
To be clear, she doesn’t “need” his wheelchair, but she does enjoy the challenge of navigating our home while giving her ski legs a break. She doesn’t also just “need” her dad for the use of his wheelchair. As both our kids grow more involved in the world of ski racing, they both seek him out after a race, especially if on our home hill, Loon Mountain, to discuss how it went. Having not grown up as a ski racer, I am glad not to know more about what I believe is the most heart breaking of all the sports. Earlier this season, our girl had an incredible first run, followed by a crash on her second run. Her comment to me later at bedtime, after the tears had stopped flowing, was, “Mom, how can you feel so awesome and so sad so close together on the same day?” My job at the finish line is to give hugs or wrap her up in an extra jacket and provide money for a hot chocolate or chocolate waffle.
But after racing, she says, “Where’s Dad right now?” And if she sees him over by the Loon Snow Sports school, where he is their training director, next to the magic carpet, she will ski away to do further analysis of the ski part of the race. I’ve cautioned Geoff to not say too much and not try to be her coach. She has incredible coaches who do the coaching part for our children. With everything I’ve read about raising ski racers (and really any serious athletes of other sports included), parents can be the ones to screw up by being overly critical or acting as coach instead of simply being supportive and loving parents. Instead, if we need to ask them a question, let them take the lead and tell us what they noticed about their run. However, part of Geoff’s job as a training director as well as member of the National PSIA Demonstration Team is to analyze people’s skiing. Our daughter especially WANTS him to analyze her skiing because she wants to be a better, stronger ski racer. Our son, currently, isn’t as “into” movement analysis as his sister, but he knows he can go to his dad with any kind of question.
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I am amazed at how much they know and understand about their bodies on skis, even at 11 and 13 years old. So, I facilitate the skiing with the rides, snacks, and hugs; they seek their dad out because they are now old enough to recognize just how much he actually understands about them as skiers – along with the skis themselves – and how their bodies move across their skis to slide downhill most efficiently, etc. They need us both – whether their dad uses a wheelchair or not. Now, whether they will come to us about the other parts of growing up – the potential friendship drama, future sports competition, the confusing feelings of liking boys or girls – remains to be seen. Yet, we are ready, or at the very least, present at the finish line, waiting together for what comes next.