Have you seen people in wheelchairs and wanted to say simply say “Hello” but didn’t know how to approach them? Before my son’s spinal cord injury, I had zero knowledge about the different types of wheelchairs. I couldn’t tell you the difference between a temporary wheelchair and someone who uses a wheelchair full time. I now can recognize types, brands, features, and details about wheelchairs.
After Zack’s injury, I’d boldly approach anyone in a chair and ask questions, eager to hear how they were injured, learn any tips or life hacks they had to offer. I was used to Zack being okay and usually appreciative if someone held or opened a door for him. He didn’t seem to mind when a total stranger asked him how he was injured or even bluntly what happened to him? But I eventually found out that some things really varied from person to person.
It wasn’t until I spoke with a very independent, young quad that I realized not everyone thought that way. This young man would turn down most help and say, “I got it” or “No thanks” and didn’t like talking about his injury. This could have been because he was emotional about his accident or simply it is his right to feel like it’s no one’s business but his own. He didn’t want to be pitied or treated any differently than an able-bodied person. More of a “say hi if you want but not just because I’m in a wheelchair”.
After this conversation I started to approach people in a less forward manner. I would start a conversation by mentioning that my son also has a spinal cord injury or is a wheelchair user. If I had a specific question, I’d let them know that it would really help me to hear their answer. I have learned the best ideas and life altering tips by speaking directly to other quadriplegics.