There was a time after my accident when I thought my disability meant that boys won’t find me attractive. I was actually pursued by a man – an attractive one!
Honest to God, I blamed my disability and didn’t think I’d get to be married. I just celebrated my second wedding anniversary.
Most of all, I never dreamed that I’d want to or have an opportunity to be a mother. I gave birth to a healthy boy in April.
So, we see, the biggest lesson I can take from the last five years is this: I have no idea what’s going to happen to me, and I’m awful at trying to guess. I am good at reflecting and taking lessons from the past, though, and I’ve landed on some significant ones – for this article, about being pregnant.
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Staying in shape is worth it.
That feels like the overarching theme of my life post-disability, but it’s especially true for pregnancy. Especially in my third trimester when I got much bigger, everything got harder. Literally everything: transfers, pushing my wheelchair, bending over, even moving my legs back and forth. The fact that I was already in shape made everything that much easier, and the load on my beloved upper body lighter.
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Diet makes a huge difference.
I knew this to be true in my pre-pregnancy state, but the point was driven home when I became pregnant; what I ate made the difference between a good day and a bad day, so I really had to stay on top of it. The food I put in my body made all the difference in my mood, how my body felt, my energy level, my appearance, everything. I can’t stress this enough.
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The power of movement.
Even when I absolutely didn’t feel like it and I’d rather unfold my pregnant body across the couch, I always felt better when I forced myself to move a little bit. For my pregnant version, that means exercises with bands, wrist weights, free weights, and a couch to bend onto and catch my breath (baby sat on my lungs for a whole month). Depending on the season, that could also look like a walk in the neighborhood or a push up a hill.
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It’s okay to get help.
I’m stubborn about asking for it, please believe I am. When my body started getting big and my mobility waved, though, it was inevitable. Asking my husband to help me didn’t kill me, either. Shocking.
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The importance of rest.
Here’s another topic I’m stubborn about: slowing down to lie down. Also inevitable, my back started aching, my ribs felt like they were turning in on each other, and I had to stretch out. I could have saved myself some strain if I’d surrendered to rest a few weeks earlier, but who gets it right on the first try? I learned my lesson for next time, at least.